Friday, April 20, 2012

A Weekend Note

Quote from this wonderful talk by Dieter F. Uchtdorf, image from this new book

This week has been full of ups and downs.  The start of the week had me in a full-fledged funk.  I was in a lull with the basement project where the stress seemed to be clouding out the excitement.  The lack of getting things done+increase of general chaos around the house has had me out of my groove.  The husband and I were chatting while we were going to bed Monday night.  Just as I began to open up to him about the reasons for my self-diagnosed funk, he fell asleep.  I laughed and rolled over and gave him a healthy dose of teasing about it this week.  He is the best listener and was so apologetic, but it still seemed so funny to me.  I'm glad I could laugh about it and let it go instead of adding it to my pile of troubles.

I've had a plateful of worries lately.  I know we all do, but for some reason they've seemed extra overwhelming when I'm already extra-charged with hormones/emotions.

My dad is falling daily and his balance seems to be rapidly declining.  I've been on the phone trying to make arrangements for a motorized chair and playing phone tag with the doctor's office about adjusting medications and trying to figure out what to do to make it better.  I think a trip to the doctor would be a good start.  (I really need to record more of the dad story in general- it's constantly on my to-do list, and I hope those lessons and inspiration will come back to me as I attempt to record them.)

The long-awaited allergist appointment happened yesterday and we got good news and bad news.  Sam was a trooper as they did a thorough (16 items!) scratch panel.  The good news is that the food allergies we've been worried about seem to be a non-issue.  The bad news is that he had the highest allergy levels possible for trees, weeds, and grasses, but it's nothing a daily allergy medicine won't help.  He also has a mild allergy to cats and dogs, letting me off the hook on the pet frontier.  ;)  The worst news is that because food allergies are not the cause of his digestive issues, we're back to the drawing board and in for more tests and a long wait to meet with a pediatric GI doctor.

On Tuesday I woke up knowing I couldn't go through the whole day with the same gloom that I carried around on Monday, so I made a list and made the effort to get the boys out the door with me for a trip to Costco.  While we were loading up to come home a friend called and I was so happy to have her drop by, even though I would be unloading groceries and feeding lunches and doing nothing too exciting.  It was so nice to talk, and as I discussed the disconnected feelings I was experiencing, she brought a fresh perspective that was oh so welcome.  She helped me see that maybe part of my funk was coming from my lack of time/resources/energy to help others, something that is usually a big part of my life.  The fact that caring for my own family is all-consuming for me right now leaves little left over for others.  As I continued to think about her observation, I realized that I need to feel needed, and not being able to help others at my normal pace and to feel needed was playing a definite role in my funk.

My visit Tuesday with my friend was a good shot in the arm, and a few hours later I received another one when I was able to help a friend with a project that we'd started on a few weeks earlier.  It involved computer skills, something I can still do, and I was so grateful to feel useful and productive and needed.  As I was visiting with this friend while we worked, the thought came to me, "You are not forgotten."  It made me think of the talk quoted above.  Hours earlier I had prayed to get out of my funk, to help others, to feel purpose, and my answers came promptly through others.  I know that I am not forgotten by my Heavenly Father, and as much as it may feel like it sometimes, that no one is.

Happy Weekend!  With a gorgeous weekend forecast I think sunshine and yard work and hopefully a visit to the tulip festival will be on the agenda.


Lindsey said...

I continue to enjoy your blog thanks to facebook and OBB! I hope you don't mind that I share this!!


Christina said...

Lindsey- You are welcome to share! Thanks for reading. I've checked in on your blog and hope things continue to improve for you and your husband during this trial!